Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Revenge Of The Life Changing Events

I can be easily amused. I can be entertained by observing screwy oddball behavior. I know a hot-blooded Latina with the stereotypical Latin bad temper, a person of the sort, usually, I would have put long ago into the reject pile. But, for some reason I find it funny to watch, like it's performance art and I'm just watching, I'm not really there in the room.

I used to know this real oddball who would repeat the same behaviors over and over again, with no self-awareness that she was doing so. Time and again this person would claim to have had a Life Changing Moment. It could be a book, a movie, a TV show, a new person she met who is like the brother, sister, cousin, whatever she never had. Just about anything could be a Life Changing Moment.

What made it funny was this particular person's life never noticeably changed, not in the improving sort of way. The Life Changing Moments never seemed to put the brakes on increasing the level of morbid obesity, ending the personal slovenliness, including living like a pig in a sty.

The series of Life Changing Events brought this person from a reasonably healthy weight, living in a nice house, to being so big she has to go in sideways to squeeze into that pigsty I already mentioned.

Now that I'm thinking about it, this same person, with all the Life Changing Events, happening to a life that's a living train wreck, also has an interesting method of getting revenge, when she perceives, via her drug-addled, distorted thinking, that someone has somehow done her wrong. She erupts into a big nonsensical, neurotic, angry upset, which causes the object of her insanity to have no choice but to reject her. She then goes through a series of followup behaviors that are as predictable as the sun, including saying that, "The best revenge is a life well lived."

Which leads the object of the "revenge" to be amused and ponder how a hugely obese, horribly homely person, who lives like a slob, in clutter and filth, who has all sorts of legal problems hanging overhead like a Sword of Damocles that can come cutting down at any random time, how can such a person be so cluelessly self-unaware as to say their best revenge is to live a good life?

That's just funny. If that's a good life, please don't let me ever see what a bad life looks like.

It's like this same person can casually say something or someone is ugly, can comment on someone else's looks in the rudest of manners, directly to the object of her rudeness. And yet this person has to have steel reinforced mirrors, so they don't crack when she looks in them. Dogs barks, children cry, men shrivel, when the hulking behemoth comes into view.

It's like on the old Mary Tyler Moore Show, at one point Murray said something was stupid. Ted Baxter bristled and said something like, "I don't know what it is, but there is something I don't like about that word, stupid."

Ted sort of knew he was stupid. He knew that was not a safe word for him to be using, lest it cause him to be the brunt of a joke. Which is what makes it perplexing as to why a rather homely, ugly type person would so easily use the "ugly" word.

Now, please understand, I generally do not comment on someone's looks. Or say someone is ugly. But if that person does not subscribe to the same good manners, they are fair game. So, if you are ugly, talking about other people or things being ugly. Well, I'm likely somehow gonna mention that you are not one to talk about ugly, if the situation arises where it seems appropriate. Particularly if the person is even uglier inside than out. Then they really are fair game.

Now, I've gotta haul my fat ugly carcass out of this pigpen and go do something aerobic on steep hills, now that it has warmed up to being in the 60s. Going to be in the low 20s tonight. Not happy about that.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

That was seriously funny. I'm pretty sure I know who you are talking about. Sidewise to get through the door?

Durango said...

Sideways to get throught the door? Well, with me it is always wise to assume there may be some slight exaggeration. Very slight.

Anonymous said...

That sad creature has gotten even bigger lately. How unhappy a person must be to do such a thing.