Sunday, January 4, 2009

Only Child Syndrome Strikes Again

Commenting on Only Child Syndrome, someone told me that "Eric Cartman (South Park) is a spoiled only child of a mother who smothers him with attention and food. He’s a greedy, manipulative being, is a smartass and a foul-mouthed little brat, is vindictive & shallow AND a liar, a cheat, a smug winner and a backstabber!"

Yup, Cartman is just like one or two of the Only Children I know. Or used to know. Only Children tend to wear out their welcome. Or steal from you, swear at you, try to get even with you and in some way or the other stab you in the back.

When I first blogged about Only Child Syndrome I had no idea there were so many people out there dealing with the Syndrome. Every day there are people coming to my blog using various search strings, such as "Only Child Brat," or "Only Child Syndrome," or "Only Child Problem," or "Only Child Liar," or "Only Child Sickness," or "Only Child Disease."

If you scroll down til you see my FeedJit stats on the right, then at the bottom of that you can click "watch in real time" and you'll likely see one or two people looking for help in dealing with an Only Child.

I've gotten quite a few comments regarding Only Child Syndrome. This morning I got a real good one, which quotes me up til the LMAO part....

"Googling 'Only Child Syndrome' I found several blogs written by Only Children, basically admitting they are different and another blog blogging about the Syndrome with several Only Children commenting on the blog and ironically and cluelessly confirming the Syndrome with their comments."------LMAO. I googled the same and could not believe the comments that were being left by only children regarding the fact that in no way did they conform to such a terrible stereotype!!! They would then continue on to contradict themselves and be completely clueless that they had done it too! Hilarious! I am engaged to an only child. I deal with the very real syndrome every day of my life. Now, probably not all only children have it, but it exists. It DEFINITELY exists!!!!! "This is mine! I won't share it!" "Look at me!! I want attention!!!" " Waaaaaaaaah you made fun of me just like I just made fun of youuuuu only I cant handle it!!!" hahaha. I wish there were more blogs about this topic. Very interesting.

Well, if you're looking for more blogs about Only Child Syndrome, this morning I found one written by an Only Child, called "Only Child Syndrome: Confessions of a recovering only child."

One of the things I find most troubling with Only Children is their irrational, easily triggered tempers. The Only Child can say the rudest, most inappropriate of remarks, but if you reply in kind, the Only Child will erupt. I've known an Only Child who will erupt if she simply perceives you are somehow being critical of her. It can be over something as simple as saying "Take a right at the next intersection." or "The change is 6 dollars, give her 6 dollars."

If you deal with an Only Child you learn to avoid the triggers. So, this sort of makes the Only Child an overbearing bully. I have an aversion to someone yelling at me, particularly when it makes no sense and is caused by the yeller's screwed up thinking, so I definitely try to avoid the triggers.

If the Only Child makes a demand, like, "Hey, I want a flat of those raspberries," you have to weigh the situation carefully. You think to yourself, "they are my berries, I got them, I've got a use for them." You think to yourself, "I know the raspberries will just go to waste if I give this pig a flat." And then you conclude, "If I tell her I'm taking all 3 flats, she will lose her temper. She's already had one fit today, it's not worth it, I'll give her a flat." And then a week later I'm at the Only Child's pigsty house and sure enough, there are the raspberries, in the fridge, maybe a third eaten, the rest starting to mold.

I've never said all Only Children fit the Only Child Syndrome mold. I will say, I have known many who do. The ones who do are all despicable, difficult human beings.

I fear China is setting itself up for a future disaster with their one child only policy. Over a billion Only Children. That can not be good for the world.

Below is a YouTube video in which what appear to be students are practicing a debate. About Only Child Syndrome....

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Cartman is not fat. He is big-boned. I agree with you, only children can be so weird and annoying. me me me me. All the time. I know one only who's parents convinced her she had great artistic talents. She is now a grown woman who paints very bad watercolors. She then hauls dozens of her artworks to flea markets where she sets up a booth. Sometimes she sells a painting. I think people take pity on her. She tells people that she sells her paintings at her gallery. I've had her do this in front of me and then get real upset when I cast a disapproving look her way.

Anonymous said...

I think I leave it all on the table as far as my "syndrome". I know exactly when my behavior has crossed the line, and I also know that sometimes I just don't care. I've learned that in the real world it is not all about me, and it has taken me a long time to also establish that in relationships. I know that people think all only children are bad, but that isn't the case anymore than all middle children feel in some way forgotten in their families. I also know that there are some good things that come from being an only child such as my will and drive to do well in school, in my job, and to one day have I would consider a success of life. Of course realizing these things come with age, and these days there is a far worse breed of only children being born so who knows what the syndrome will look like in 10 years.

I still am unsure if you linking to my blog was good or bad, but I hope that you understand that I do indeed get it.

Durango said...

"I still am unsure if you linking to my blog was good or bad, but I hope that you understand that I do indeed get it."

The above is such an "Only Child" type thing to say. Your Blog is very good. . In my opinion. And you seem to have done a lot of work regarding recovering from the Syndrome. Gook luck in your continuing recovery.

Anonymous said...

I deal with an only child every day. She is one of the rudest, most manipulative individuals I have ever had the misfortune to meet. She's continually sulking and brazenly insulting towards coworkers and disrespects her supervisors behind their backs. And, in spite of this, and her own admission that she is known to be a troublemaker, she would emphatically deny having OCS. I am just continually flabbergasted by her lies and manipulation tactics. How do they even bear to face themselves in the mirror? Amazing...

Anonymous said...

One only child is not like every other only child so do not get stuck in grouping them all together. You limit your ability to expand your horizons and accept others for who they are when you label and classify people. There are plenty of people out there that are insulting, direspectful, troublemakers and are manipulators and has nothing to do with with their birth order or with being an only child - it is a choice!

Anonymous said...

You are right when you say not all only children have OCS but the ones that do are very difficult to live with. I married a guy that is an only child. We are now seperated. We have two children together and his selfish behaviour continues to make my life a total nightmare. My 14 year old is more mature and has better people skills than her father. I wish I knew about this syndrome before we married. One the other hand I have two wonderful beautiful daughters that I love more than anything in the world!

Durango said...

Latest Anonymous---
Sorry you were an OCS victim. It can take some time to recover. I have been OCS free for over 10 months. You don't know how bad it was til you are free of the toxicity.

Anonymous said...

So for the first time I went online to see what was online about only children.
A an only child it still seems so far fetched the idea of a family with multiple kids...wierddd.

But what do I find?? A bunch of Only Child Haters! I mean you guys are talking about a few rude people you know "ohh that's so only child to say" etc.etc.

And who's this person who's "getting over" being an onlychild. What, you mean your having trouble not being manipulative and you have a blog about your trial and tribulations?

I mean to latch on these negative things with a person who didnt have siblings is a little silly to me.

Well suppose it is a problem?
Then what do we need to stop doing????